ok. obviously, the previous entries were transferred from livejournal back to my old blog here. I guess i was trying to avoid the reality that i'm incapable of altering the appearance of my livejournal. hahaz...whatever the reason...i'm back to using this.

I've been really tired of working nowadays. Facing many troubles and problems in the shop now. In march, i was trying to quit. I didn't quit ultimately because i felt a need to be responsible for a promise i made, which ensured my employment. Also, i felt an obligation to "help" others there. The shop is constantly facing a shortage of manpower anyway. I guess, it was the friendship cultivated there that caused me to persist on for a moment.

However, as time passes, friendships were lost. Danny was posted away. Yoyo was fired. While i kept in contact with them, the shop was no longer the same. Never mind the fact that new colleagues were employed, and others were transferred here. To add on to the accumulating problems, the boss had a changed attitude towards workers. He was no longer caring, and blamed us mindlessly for any mistake committed, or work undone. It's as if we had the time to clear up the mess created by the customers when we are so preoccupied with sales, and the 200+ boxes that arrive without fail every month when we thought we finally had the time to clear up something. I feel that i've been blamed of something every moment while working. I'm not the only victim of course. the main victim's dajie. She's blamed for everything. And she's currently unstable in a certain sense.

So a few days ago, 200+ boxes of goods from china just arrived. there were no extra workers (only one self-proclaimed part-timer). There were only the usual number of people working.

One cashier, one salesgirl, one game-ic, one technician. I was the only extra one out, so i was busy trying to settle those 200+ boxes. the self-proclaimed part-timer was more than useless. He was completely ignorant of my commands. i told him to check every single box so that those containing stationery would not be left out. He went out and came in promptly. "done!" he said.

After that, i dragged liying(who came to my rescue for only a day) out to check those boxes again. We found 5 more. And those boxes were in very conspicuous places. I guess, his definition of stationery is rather narrow, or he probably forgot the meaning of stationery. I was utterly irritated with him. He's not only not helping me, he was giving me more trouble.

After the stationery-containing boxes were carried into the shop, the stationery was laid out and price labelled. Since everyone was armed with a label gadget, and i wasn't, i went out to label the boxes. They weren't easy to move. Some were extremely heavy.

I looked around helplessly hoping help would come, but it never arrived. I don't know how much muscles i've strained to get those boxes up and down. fortunately, liying came out halfway. she helped me with the boxes. thanks a lot!

However, after a while, liying had to leave and i was all alone to deal with the mess created inside n outside. while stationery was taken out to be priced, they were not packed properly and left aside. I was left irritated. I have to deal with a mess created by others. and guess wad? the self-proclaimed part-timer was slacking all the way at the back of the shop, probably sms-ing and doing nothing. AFter which, he found himself a place at the game counter where he wasn't employed to be. He wasn't selling anything, juz standing there, not doing anything, and obviously not helping me. He was supposed to be packing goods, not selling games. A girl to pack 200+ boxes of stuffs without help and paid only a measly 4bucks an hour. I was challenged mentally and physically.

After that, dajie asked me to stop packing those goods and to help with the ordering of taiwan books. So i went into the office to help scan those order lists. The computer gave me a whole load of problems. and the technician is obviously not around to help me settle some problems. I couldn't email the order lists in the end.

Another problem i faced was dinner. I remember asking the dinner buyer(the self-proclaimed part-timer) to buy my food and the boss' maid's (rita) food. he returned promptly (again). he bought only the guys' food. The girls had no food simply because he dunno where the shop was. so shiling went down instead to buy and i had to leave my job post to take over hers. When i was about to have my dinner, i found out that he did not buy the maid's food. I was really angered. I was facing a dilemma at the same time. I ate only breakfast and i was really hungry for dinner. but it's either, rita going hungry or me. Rita is really nice to me and i like consulting her regarding many problems (other than work). She still has to work when she gets home with the boss. So i gave her my dinner. And i went hungry. At the end of the day, i could really feel myself on the verge of breaking down. When i left (avoiding having to OT), the boss' child waved goodbye. i didn't notice because i was really lethargic. Then the boss called me and said (supposedly jokingly but i was not in a mood to joke), "hey, y r u so disrespectful? my boy's saying goodbye!" i would appreciate the fact that i'm senior and your child's junior and it's morally right for him to respect me and say goodbye. thanks

when i was walking out, i could feel tears welling up (even at this moment while i'm typing).

These few days, i was doing plenty of overtime. at this moment, i don't really feel like going into the details.

on friday, while packing newly arrived taiwan books...

i found out that 200+ boxes of goods were arriving, and the boss was looking for part-timers. Ahpek said that the boss was employing them for 50 a day, and told ahpek to look for a few of them. the next moment, i broke out. they are paid 50 dollars a day and i, also a part-timer, is paid only a measly 44 hours a day working myself to death and having to juggle multiple tasks at the same time. I was really angry. however, i'm not one who starts cursing when angry, or throws my tasks aside or go crazy. I went emotional and the next moment i knew it, i was crying. ahpek was trying to console me but i knew, the more he consoled, the more i cried. I was facing a problem called extreme exploitation. I can only say that i'm stupid to persist in this line. I'm really stupid. I don't regret because i've learnt. but i can only say that i'm stupid to learn this way. I cried really badly in the shop for the first time and i guess my colleagues were really scared.

No extra pay for working OT. No extra pay for working at night. No extra pay for working on weekends. No extra pay for working on public holidays. The life of a part-timer in that shop? I sell books. i promote books for rental. i do cashier's jobs. i do cleaner's jobs by tidying the place from time to time, collecting books and placing them on shelves and cleaning up dirt left behind by customers. i do delivery jobs. i do collector's jobs. i do technician's jobs by repairing computers. I do labourer's jobs by carrying plenty of stuffs. I do administrative work, the scanning and stuffs. i receive complaints, deal with complaints and whatever. That's not all. All the jobs the rest don't wanna do are thrown to me. and i'm paid 4bucks an hour. thanks. i can only say. I'm really stupid, dumb, blind and i'm a real idiot. thanks.