Do i consider jc life redundant?
I had a short little conversation with bun just now. When i revealed to him the course i aspire to take, he was rather "shocked" or in his words, "stunned". Then he asked me why i did not choose to apply to NYP 2 years ago and wasted 2 years of my life. The subjects I take in JC may or may not prove useful in helping me understand what i will be learning. Well, the grades i get may prove my academic level among the rest, but will the knowledge i gained help me through my learning process?
This conversation triggered a train of thoughts. Wouldn't secondary school be redundant too? The things we learnt in secondary school are considered basic when compared to what we are learning in JC. Did the knowledge i gained then help me understand advanced concepts? Not really or to a small extent. At times, teachers tell us, "what you've learnt in secondary school is too simple and would not be applicable for advanced questions" We have to start learning a whole lot of concepts again. Wouldn't it be better if we went directly into the difficult concepts since secondary school? Then we would not have to struggle trying to understand content which we've never touched before in a short span on 2 years.
On the other hand, imagine the amount of stress that we have to handle at that tender age just trying to understand certain theories or logics in order to score well. Our brains may not have developed fully for us to comprehend those concepts.
I'm contradicting myself. Was going a jc a right choice? Perhaps jc serves as a stepping stone on my way to university. It gives me extra time to consider what paths i may be taking. This period of time allows me discover and analyse the paths most suitable for me. I guess, the reason why i went to JC is because i haven't decided on what roads to take when i was in sec 4. Perhaps, the other reason is because it's the "common way" to walk. although the thought of going poly after sec4 such that i could step into society early has crossed my mind, i didn't think further.
I enjoyed my jc life though. I met lots of nice people. My classmates, my teachers, my cca mates and other friends. I don't regret entering jc.

sometimes i feel that they are just not concerned enough. Sometimes i feel that they are overly concerned. Sometimes i feel irritated at them for interrupting my chain of thoughts. Sometimes i feel lonely because they are not concerned about what i'm thinking. i'm a person full of contradictions.

Decision-making is such a difficult process! How many decisions must we make on average a day? Hundreds. The decisions we make each day may be significant or insignificant, depending on how much they affect our future or lives.
Each day, my dad has to decide what my family will be having for breakfast the next day. He has to consider various factors. Firstly, the price of bread. In addition, our personal preferences, the nutritional value of that flavour of bread and quantity affect the decisions he makes. It's only a simple act of buying bread, but it incorporates decision-making.
Other not-so-significant decisions we make daily includes whether to turn left or right when we are at a road junction, which road to take such that i'd require the least time to reach my destination and so on.
Significant decisions we make include which universities to apply to, which courses we might be taking and the list goes on. They are significant because they affect the next few years of our lives, or on a greater scale, our future. They require serious thinking and more analysis as compared to those not-so-significant decisions due to the greater impact they have. A wrong decision made can either affect our lives drastically or we could run away from the consequences depending on luck.
Thinking about this... I believe that every decision i make every second leads me to a different path of life. I believe that an act i decided to perform at a point of time affects the path i'll be taking in the next few seconds or even my entire life! Seems illogical...
Well, knowing how difficult it is to make a decision, i've tried to reduce my pa's responsibility to decide on my meals he's in charge of buying home. Each time he asks for my choice of dinner, i'll readily give him my reply, such that he could make one less decision.
The act of saying "anything" may simply imply that one's not choosy or picky, but it intensifies the burden the other party is carrying.
Hopefully, this act of mine can help reduce my pa's burden =D

~Maybe i was just hesitating. I should be true to myself but i can't bring myself to. Perhaps i'm one living in self-denial...~

I had quite a fun day today i guess... First, it was phototaking. Well, i felt sort of nostalgic when i put on my stnicks uniform. I felt that i grew fatter, and i missed my times in stnicks. To think that mx and i are laughing about what we did in the past. Our skirts always remain long because we use our skirts to "cover up" when we sit in a rather "exposed" manner in our school. We can't do that in HC now because the skirt is too short!! not enough to cover... At the end of the phototaking session (we took quite a few nice photos), mx, karin and i simply thought that since we are in our sec sch uniforms, we might as well take a few more photos. We took quite a few "act cute" photos... but i won't post here...for privacy's sake.

Then during break, we had chocolate cake!! nice... but i got a sore throat later =( i drank lots of water but apparently, that didn't help.
And yes...darling!! hope you loved your surprise... hahaz... that was mx's idea though... don't judge her by her size, she can do big things!! i had a hard time lying to you though... mx, fel, jaey and i bought a miniature cake, strawberry-flavoured and heart-shaped for darling. we surprised her after the class celebrated for the aug babies! hahaz...and was she surprised? according to her blog...yes =D i'm glad you had a nice day...

Lastly, the surprise for mx on her bdae! After jaey's well-planned surprise, we had to plan a new one for mx. Running out of ideas, i decided to employ the method we used to encourage our seniors. Formulating a full message for her, we divided the message into 3 parts and each of us (fel, jaey and i) sent one each. according to mx, it was because jaey's sms that lagged that she got a surprise. My sms which went first, appeared broken and incomplete and she was about to reply me when she got jaey's which happened to be the next part of the message. After jaey's, she received fel's! perfect timing ehhh... =D

Surprises are nice because they bring happiness to people (i hope?) now...i have to think of ideas for fel's bdae!! arghhhhz....

Got hooked on to songs by True Kiss Destination because of Naomi Sensei!! Their songs are quite unique (???) one of their songs starts with cannon in D, then somehow, they managed to compose a song based on cannon in D. (do i make sense?) oh whatever...i like their songs...

Hmmmz.... i still want norika's hairstyle...

I want fujiwara norika's hairstyle!! she has maintained this hairstyle of hers throughout her career life.. i want it too!! If i look this chio with her hairstyle, then w00ts!

Tonight is the first night i am online this early....8.42pm... i think i'm simply too tired. After reaching home from school, i started watching "NAOMI" starring the above babe. Somehow, my parents also started watching with me despite that show being a school-life type of show. You know, it's the female version of GTO simply. Just that, norika don't smoke in the show but she's still cool. That show of hers isn't well-known but i still like it a lot. Funny yet serious at times.

Somehow, i managed to find certain parallels in today's society in this show. Perhaps children are just increasingly difficult to understand nowadays. Maybe, only teachers like Naomi, who isn't afraid of anything may be able to understand students better by exploring(or rather, enter by force) their internal world. Something plausible stated in the show, or depicted, is that when Naomi was given the records of her form class' students, she simply dumped them away. "I'd prefer to judge them from how i see them. Those records are how people judged them, i don't need them." I admire her. However, such daring attitudes of her are simply not applicable in today's society i guess. In a nutshell, it's only a show meant for entertainment.

w00ts...it's 12am and here i am, typing in front of the computer. I have nothing to say. I'm sadded =(

The Chinooks and Apaches on National Day were very cool!! If only my eyesight hasn't deteriorated that much, i MIGHT have a small little chance to at least fly a small aeroplane. What's done cannot be undone though, unless i go for a Lasik operation, which i'm most reluctant to. AHhhz....at LEAST, i still have the chance to drive a boat since eyesight isn't an important criteria here. You know...those motor boats... All i need is time to try them out. One fine day, i asked my pa, "can i obtain a licence for riding motorcycles?" He said, "You can, but don't try to ride one on singapore roads. It's extremely dangerous and the disadvantages outweigh the advantages." This i agree. Considering the number of road bullies, i can't help but sigh.
Until now, i'm still mesmerized by the sight of F-16s and Chinooks. If only i went on the F16 during the Airbase openhouse...Regret ah regret...
Other than the flying machines, nothing else really attracted me in the whole National Day Parade. The mood was not there because i watched it at home. next year, i shall fight for the tickets!!

bun: if you see this, i wanna tell u....you sucks!!! LOL!!!

Feeling extremely lethargic now... but i shall finish typing this entry....
Took 156 home alone =( everyone stayed back in school to mug and this is scary!!! mugger mode hur... Met one of the Wahs at the bus stop and i didn't know who he was, so i simply didn't bother to greet? what a mean senior eh... but i seriously had no idea which one he was. It was until he got off the bus then i knew that he was wahtoon. =.=

twins are so difficult to differentiate. Qing Shan too... For the first year, i had a terrible time differentiating the two of them. Getting their names right had a probability of 0.5. I still remember the first time we met, when two half-crazy stnicks girls ran over to me while i was waiting outside a classroom at MOELC, only to know that we'll be classmates and we'll be in the same CCA. Never did we know at the moment of time, that our relationship can progress so much. After one year, i managed to differentiate the two of them, by character, by face and by voice. I'll know who's speaking over the phone whenever either one called. Orhhh... i miss them...

Another pair i know was in the same pri 6 class as me. I sat with one. They look different the first moment i see them and i could easily differentiate the two of them. They fight in class perpetually. I'm not sure about now, but i guess they still fight. At least, i won't see them fighting in school cos they are finally in different JCs. One's in s7C and the other's in RJC.

I met quite a few ex-pri classmates at the bus stop and on the bus. I met Fongyi at the bus stop but apparently, he don't recognise me already. Then i met dwayne on the bus but obviously, he doesn't recognise me either. did i really change so much or did we just fail to acknowledge each other despite knowing the existence of each other? It's quite sad, having lost contact with most of my pri sch classmates. As for secondary school, since i was never close to the rest other than a few for my entire 4 years, it's not surprising that i no longer keep in contact with them. Perhaps occasional chats and so on.

I find it quite pathetic, that i'm no longer that spontaneous (i'm not a radioactive substance). Seeing people i know, i fail to acknowledge or even "recognise" them, so to say. Despite seeing that "friend" everyday in school, it's like... the feel is like... or rather, the thought in my mind was... "i know you. i wanna sae hello to you. but should i say? do you still remember me? if you don't, i'll feel extremely disappointed. if you do, i'll be very happy. So, do you still remember me?" Perhaps i'm just pathetic... i must learn to initiate more i think. At least, i can salvage a few disappearing friendships? hopefully.